Have you seen the Apple TV show “Shrinking”?
It. Is. Awesome.
Aside from a stellar cast and a highly irreverent sense of humor (which I have always been drawn to), it covers some of the deepest emotions that we all struggle with.
Season 1 was particularly focused on grief. As in laser-focused. And apparently able to read my soul from the TV screen.
The show brings back all kinds of memories from the loss of my wife, Diana, to leukemia.
And just like the main character of “Shrinking,” when Diana died I had not the foggiest clue how to navigate grief. Especially while fathering two kids and working in Fortune 500 leadership.
And I say that while fully acknowledging that I should have. I have a freaking master’s degree in psychology, for goodness’ sake.
But at the same time, I knew I had to figure it out. I knew that some way, there was a path. I just had to learn it.
Which brings me to this year.
The holidays are upon us. And my heart is FULL.
I am now back on my home island. My kids are here to celebrate with happy hearts. And I am now re-married (to a wonderful woman named Kathy). Which also brings 3 step-kids and the adventure of figuring out what “blended family” means.
But like I said… my heart is FULL.
You see, the chaos and confusion I went through wasn’t a curse. It was a forge. And a teacher.
And it taught me to be a different person. A better person. A happier person. And ultimately, a person that I can honestly say that I love.
Which wasn’t always the case. I could be my own worst critic. I could always find fault with myself and/or what I was doing.
But grief changed that. In the best way possible.
Now, I can sit with the memories of the past and smile – even as the tears may form in the corners of my eyes.
That’s how grief works. We grieve because we love.
And if – right now – you are starting to feel your grief, it’s okay.
You might be grieving a lost person. You might be grieving a lost job. You might even be grieving that you are stuck in a job that you no longer enjoy.
And it’s okay. We grieve because we love.
If you can tap into that love, you can let it inspire something more than fear. Because love drives away fear.
Love inspires. It encourages. It hopes.
And that’s why we celebrate holidays. Because they bring us hope.
Hope for new people in our lives. Hope for new opportunities and – yes – even new jobs.
So, if you are struggling this holiday season, please tell yourself it’s okay. And let hope have its chance to love you. To embrace you. To speak to you.
And let THAT voice begin to teach you how to navigate your way forward.
Because that’s where the journey takes you. Forward. Onward. And upward.
Happy holidays, my friend. And may hope abound.
Originally published at https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/holiday-message-tim-ohai-phgic
An extra thought:
“Out of difficulties grow miracles.”
~ Jean de La Bruyère
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